Hope Is Somewhere Here

I'm sorry I haven't written in a few days. I've been dealing with stuff and haven't been feeling myself and didn't want to write. I got so upset the other day, after I wrote the previous post Crying that when a police officer knocked on the door the next morning, I nearly passed out. He had to call an ambulance and the paramedics checked me out. I had low blood pressure and a high pulse rate. The police officer was looking for someone else, but I was the one who answered the door. It was the weirdest feeling. When I opened the door everything started going dark for like 2-3 minutes and I couldn't see anything and could barely talk.

I don't know why it happened - but I think I was too upset, dehydrated and hadn't eaten anything for a few days. The paramedics were gonna take me to the hospital, but I refused because it would cost so much and I have no income. My landlord called my dad and he talked to me. Everyone in the house was worried about me. I guess for a good reason.

Also, one of my room mates was drunk last night and got angry at me for being "dishonest" even though I was telling him the truth. Kicked me out of his room and wouldn't let me in this morning. He made me cry and his friend came down and calmed me down and stayed with me.

So many things going on lately, I feel so small and helpless. But I have to believe that everything will turn out good. It has to, right? We are who we are and we get stronger through rough patches in life. I'm not exactly going through a rough patch, per say, but it has been very hard dealing with people lately.

Well, i'm signing off. Thank you to you guys who read my blog and comment. Means more than you'll ever know :)

Is There Anybody Out There